I'm Not Waiting

My alarm was set for 5am. My plan was to sleep until my alarm went off. Then when my fitbit buzzed it's soothing wake up call, my plan was to swiftly get out of bed, drink spark and rehydrate, spend some time with Jesus, workout for 30 minutes and then get ready for the day. My clothes were set out for the gym, and my drink prep was all ready to go. But that isn't what happened at all.

First, I woke up at 2:47am to use the restroom. On the way back to the bed, I stepped in a delicious pile of evidence that my dog's stomach was upsetting her. So instead of getting to just fumble back to my bed in the dark, I got to clean my foot, sanitize the floor, and prepare the bath rug to be washed in the morning.

As soon as I crawled back in bed, Ryot came in the room to tell me that the light on her clock had gone off and she wanted it back on. We walked back to her room, turned her clock on, and I reminded her that the light would go off in a minute. I told her that it shouldn't matter because her eyes were supposed to be closed. When my head hit the pillow a little after 3am, I was irritated that I was awake. I was lying there wondering why I was even awake and then I got a word for a friend. I grabbed my phone and sent it to her immediately and was shocked that she responded. We texted for a short while and then I went back to sleep.

I'm not sure how much time had past since falling asleep, but Sweetness was back in my room telling me that she was hungry. Again we walked back to her room where I reminded her that we are not Amish and don't eat meals in the middle of the night. She whined that she wanted to be Amish and I patted her back to sleep in between wimperings. I carefully placed every step back to my bed, not wanting to hit any more puppy land mines.

Yet again about an hour later, Sweetness was back in our room. She wanted to lay with me and tried to crawl in our bed, but we usually end up pushing my handsome Mr. to the very edge of the bed when she joins us, so we again made the walk back to her bedroom. This time I just didn't say anything and crawled in the twin bed with my Sweets. She asked if I would stay with her and I just said "shhhh" and fell asleep. I woke up maybe 3 more times really cold but realized that I still had the cover on me.

Maybe that's why my little sweets kept waking up.
Maybe she was cold.
Maybe she was hungry, even though she ate all of her dinner and some of mine.
Maybe she is going through a growth spurt.
Who knows.

Maybe I woke up and stepped in dog poop so that I would be awake enough to send some encouragement to a friend.
Maybe I woke up because the enemy wants me to be tired and groggy and use my terrible night's sleep as an excuse to not have unexplainable joy.

I don't think either of those last two maybe's are actually maybe's.

I am tired.
I am bummed that I didn't get to work out.
I am watching the count go up on my fitbit challenges and planning in my mind tonight how I'm going to catch up.
I will not let sleep deprivation effect my mood.
How I feel does not change the beautiful facts that I was a sinner who had no hope, but God loved me, sought after me, sent His Son to die for me, and pursues a relationship constantly.

Psalm 39:7 "An now, O Lord, for what do I wait? My hope is in You."

Are you waiting for a good night's sleep to put your hope in God?
Are you waiting for your cup of coffee before singing His praises?
Are you waiting for a new job, boss, president, etc before surrendering all you are and have to the One who created it all in the first place?
Are you waiting to be completely healthy before finding joy in all circumstances?

I think the enemy wants to keep us in a hold pattern.
Who will win our heart today?
Who will win our hope?
Who will win our affection?

Our hope is in the everlasting, all-knowing Creator who is crazy in love with us and is constantly working all things for good.

What are you waiting for?